Chatter From the Back Of the Room and My Car

There are a lot of tough frustrating days when you have to work with scholars with emotional disabilities.  Fortunately for me the support group that I am privileged to work with can make me laugh on some of those tough days.  I'm tempted to give you their real names but that would break one of my rules.  What I can do is talk about them.

The rivalry is my favorite back of the room conversation.  Quietly while BaseG is running the show and learning is occurring the little but vicious animal (me) chats with the male mascot that wears a skirt (PhD? Sparty).  Football season was brutal for me.  First the vicious animal lost but to make matters worse PhD? Sparty put a small stuffed version of the male mascot in a skirt on my desk.  To rid my desk of this object I was hoping The Collector would see it and make it disappear.  PhD? Sparty is familiar with The Collector and was closely monitoring the situation.  I got to shine during basketball season when the vicious animal won the regular season basketball title.  Unlike someone I was subtle with my bragging.  NOT!  On the white board in my best penmanship in big letters the final score was printed.  The table was turned when the male mascot in a skirt won the end of the season basketball tournament.  Man, who would have thought that one person could wear green and white for six consecutive days.  My final comment on the rivalry.  The vicious animal stayed in the big dance longer than the male mascot in a skirt so there.  End of conversation.

IvyL is the newbie on the support team.  At first our conversation was on a pleasant professional level but it didn't take long for her to join in on the banter.  It also didn't take long for her to win over the young scholars in the room.  She had the perfect strategy.  No not professional charm or fun activities but one simple thing COOKIES.  There is no better way to hold a scholars attention during Wednesday group sessions than to promise them cookies if their behavior is good.  

Some of the best conversations I've had have been with Gee and they took place in my car.  That may seem odd so I'll tell you this about Gee.  First of all he is in charge of the in-school suspension room and may have the most challenging job at the school.   He also spends a ton a time with young scholar athletes as a coach.  The time he devotes to athletics is impressive so on the days he needs a ride to the local high school so he can get to practice I give him a ride.  Now you are probably wondering what we talk about so I'll keep it simple.  It's guy talk.  Sometimes it's sports or politics but mostly what we talk about is misbehaving scholars and what we would do if we were their parental unit.  If you need a hint on what we would do think Sister Ambrose.  That's it, no further comment.

Sometimes it's all in the timing and Oreo is a master at timing.  I don't know how she does it but on numerous occasions she has walked into the classroom just when BaseG or I are about to lose our patients with a scholar.  She calmly takes the scholar out of the room so we can regain our composure.  She will read with them, do math work sheets with them or just simple give them some exercise just to keep them busy.  It doesn't sound like much but believe me there a many times when the adults in the classroom need a time out and she provides it for us.

The day IvyL slipped up will stay with me for a while.  The discussion was about dinner at a restaurant called Shoefly.  PhD? Sparty mentioned going there with her gentleman caller for dinner.  IvyL was quick to say I wish some GUY would take me out to dinner.  I was on this comment like a fly was on stink.  Some GUY I said.  So that is how you women think.  That was priceless and good for a laugh.

There is one gentleman that is not a part of this group, is not an employee of this school and is a person that I've never met but would like to meet someday.  Sounds a bit odd but let me tell you the most important important thing about this gentleman.  Like PhD? Sparty he can talk about Detroit.  No not the Detroit of today but the Detroit back in the days when the Tigers played at Briggs Stadium, the Lions and Packers met on Thanksgiving Day, J. L. Hudson's held a Thanksgiving Day parade, the zoo was top notch, Boblo Island was in existence and Belle Isle didn't host a boring Indy  car race.  Now that is the Detroit that I know and talking about it with someone close to my age would be fun.  Dang!  I forgot one item.  I'd like to talk to this gentleman and ask him what he was thinking when he named his daughter after a Steely Dan album. 

So to PhD? Sparty, IvyL, Gee and Oreo I say as I rise up into my best military posture and salute thank you for what you do each day for these scholars and for me.  You are the best.

The Little Princess

During my early days as a volunteer doubts about my ability to help scholars who were struggling academically entered my head.  All of that end when I was asked to help a fourth grade scholar named Norton improve his reading.  Norton sat in the far back left corner of the room all by himself.  His desk rather than facing the front of the room faced the window.  During previous visits to this classroom I tried to help Norton with his class work but he refused stating I'm not doing any work today.  His response caught me off guard a little and I wanted to say something appropriate to him but I just remained silent.  While in the car heading home I thought about Norton and wonder what Sister Ambrose would have said to me if I said to her I'm not doing any work today when she was my fourth grade teacher.  I'm sitting here laughing to myself as I'm thinking Sister Ambrose might say nothing but her silence would be accompanied by a loud smack.

On my next visit to the fourth grade the teacher asked to speak to    
me outside the room.  This made me a little nervous as I thought I    
might have done something wrong but she just said I need you to 
do something for me.  I said ok and she then stated Norton
approached her and said he wanted to learn how to read.  She     
proceeded to tell me that she had twenty six scholars in her room and didn't have the time to help Norton one on one so she ask me if  I could  help him read.  I said I'd be glad to do that and within two  minutes I'm in the hallway with Norton looking for a place to read. 

Norton is a big kid for his age.  He is the tallest student in the class 
and is a bit on the chunky side.  He also has this look on his face    
that says what are you looking at and if you didn't know him he could be intimidating.  I finally find a place to read and I ask Norton to show me the book he is reading.  So this big chunk of a boy pulls out his book and the title is The Little Princess.  I'm now 
suppressing my need to laugh and start talking about the front cover of the book.  On the cover is a picture of the Little Princess, a man      
in a military uniform and a gentleman wearing a turbin with a      
monkey on his shoulder.  I'm guessing when Norton selected this    
book he was more interested in the cover than the book title.  To 
put him at ease I said I'd read the first paragraph and then we'll   
alternate paragraphs.  He agreed and we started reading The Little 
Princess.

Here is what I learned after three weeks of reading with Norton.  First was that he was a year or maybe two years behind in his 
ability to read.  Next was that his ability to read improved 
because one day he said to me Mr. Schultz I don't want to read this 
book any more.  When I asked him why he said it was a girls book.  I took that comment as a sign of progress.  Last and most important 
was a conversation I had with his teacher.  She showed me the results of a reading test Norton took.  His score was twenty six and I said that is a pretty low score.  She said it was and then she told me all his previous scores were zero.  She then said that because I agreed to help him he will finally post a score showing he can read.  That made me feel pretty good and I knew that I could do some good at this school.

Sometimes I Feel Like A Motherless Child

In 1969 Richie Havens opened the Woodstock music festival in upstate New York with a song called Freedom.  The lyrics included the line sometimes I feel like a motherless child a long way from home.  When I came up with the title of this post I knew I wanted to use these lyrics but I could not recall who sang the song so I did a google search and I learned two things about these lyrics.  The lyrics go back to the days of slavery and many African American artists have used these lyrics in their songs and Richie Havens was the name of the artist I couldn't recall.

I chose these lyrics because they summarized how I felt on the last day of school before spring break.  So how did I feel?  I can tell you it was not good because that would describe how the food I ate tastes so I will say sad, disappointed, agitated, frustrated and at a total loss on how I can help the scholars in my class cope with their emotional disabilities.       

The day was supposed to be a fun day.  The school lunch menu was a picnic theme with box lunches.  BaseG added to the fun by      buying pizza and drinks and IvyL and Phd? Sparty brought cookies.     
Unfortunately what was supposed to be fun was not fun, it was a      mess.  Floss got upset with Yo over the simple task of hooking two    paper clips together.  Yo in his typical fashion started fishing to     further agitate Floss which resulted in Floss standing and angrily     confronting Yo.  Straw as he has in the past decided to help himself to other scholars food when they weren't looking.  His target was   The Collector's box lunch first by taking his drink and a bit later his cookie.  The Collector is now upset and is walking around the room knocking over chairs.  EM insisted on interrupting BaseG who was    speaking to another scholar.  When BaseG asked him to not   interrupt and wait he got upset and angrily threw his container of   chocolate milk against the wall.  The container broke open and    there was chocolate milk running down the wall and all over the   
floor.  This was supposed to be a fun day and now you know what I see regularly from my view at the back of the room.    

If Phd? Sparty or IvyL asked me how I'm feeling right at this very   instant I would say angry.  Angry because I know the school has a    great leader in the Big Boss.  Angry because I know I work with a    great support group that includes Phd? Sparty, IvyL, Gee and Oreo   who will do anything to help these scholars.  Angry because even  with all this ongoing chaos in the classroom BaseG has managed to  raise the test scores of these scholars.  Angry because if we can't  get a handle on how to help these scholars control their anger one    of them will have gone on to a better place or be incarcerated by  the time he graduates from high school.

That's it.  I need a time out. 

He's Holding It Like An Ice Pick

The Public School Hiring Process

I never thought that either volunteering or getting hired to work in a public school would be a test of endurance because from the very beginning the Principal said yes I want you on my team.  I knew up front there would be a background check.  I also knew up front that there would not be a drug test which to this day I find interesting.  What I was not prepared for was the minutia that delayed the process.  First of all was taking a test.  That went well although some of the math questions made me pause and think for a minute.  Next up was to prove that I had eighty credit hours of college courses.  For clarification purposes the credit hours check was for getting hired and not to volunteer.  Again this was not a concern as I have a degree from Central Michigan University.  The degree was issued in 1976 and I'm thinking where is that degree.  After an extensive search I found it in the sub basement level of the clothes closet in a fireproof container with way to much dust on it.  With degree in hand I head to the school so I can fax it to the Human Capital department at the main office of the school system. This is the last step in the process so I'm getting excited about starting.  A couple days pass and the cell phone rings.  I'm sorry Mr. Schultz but a copy of your diploma from a four year university is not sufficient to prove you have taken eighty credit hours of college courses.  Please send us a copy of your transcripts.  From the very beginning the Principal said hire this man but Human Capital insists on doing everything possible to slow down the process.  I'll comment on the department title Human Capital in a minute.  So I do an internet search for CMU's telephone number and call them and request a copy of my transcripts.  Well Mr. Schultz we will be glad to send you a copy of your transcripts but first you have to send us some money.

It took five weeks to complete the hiring process.  All this time the classroom teacher is without her instructional assistant in a special education classroom for scholars with emotional (anger) disabilities.  I was so frustrated that I went to the Principal and asked if I could volunteer in the classroom until I get hired.  The Principal immediately responded yes because I had already jumped through all the hoops to be a volunteer.  Finally I could walk into the classroom.

The Department of Human Capital.  The first thought that entered my head when I heard this was slavery.  When you take into consideration that there is a sizeable number of African American scholars in this school system you have to wonder why this title was chosen.

I Gotta Use It

Shortly after breakfast a new scholar in the room is moving quickly towards my desk at the back of the room.  Mr. S, Mr. S. "I gotta use it." I look up at Kirby who is fidgety and kind of bouncing up and down and say to him use what.  I gotta us it Mr. S, I gotta use it.  Once again I ask use what.  From across the room CorP gets my attention and says Mr. S he needs to go to the bathroom.  Ohhhh!  I look at Kirby and say go and don't forget to wash your hands.  In a flash this former scholar is out the door.

A side note I love the fact that the restroom is immediately across the hallway from our room.  Because we are designated a special education room anytime a scholar leaves our room I'm supposed to escort them.  Having "to use it" is an exception to the escort rule as I can see the entrance to the restroom from my view at the back of the room.

Kirby was an interesting student as he was a ball of energy and had no boundaries.  He was also quite a challenge to work with because he hated subtraction.  In order to explain why he was a challenge to work with be aware that inappropriate language will be used and it will not be coming from my mouth.

Every day morning work is assigned to each scholar as a way to get them focused for the academic day.  In Kirby's case he had math worksheets that were either addition or subtraction.  Doing the addition worksheet was a piece of cake but subtraction was always an adventure.  Fortunately my experiences with Kirby had me well prepared.

BaseG is in charge and he gets every one calmed down and passes out the morning work every day.  His last drop off point is Kirby who is in the back row.  From my view at the back of the room he is right by me.  The subtraction worksheet lands on Kirby's desk.  After looking at it he goes into full  
battle mode.  I hate subtraction and I'm not doing it as the worksheet is being tossed in the air.  I get   up and retrieve the work sheet.  He takes it and again tosses it in the air and this time his pencil also   goes airborne.  I am not doing subtraction can I pleeaassee do addition.  I retrieve the pencil and   worksheet and hand them to him.  He takes the work sheet and says to me Mr. S you're starting to  piss me off as he tears the worksheet in half.  I'm prepared for this defensive tactic as I have multiple   copies of the worksheet so I hand him another one.  Twice more the worksheet is torn in half and he   states to me that he is going to stab me and punch me.  So I say to him you go ahead and punch me.    When you get so tired of punching me that you can no longer punch me you are still going to have to  
do this worksheet.

As I said in the beginning I'm in a grade school.  We have scholars fromkindergarten through sixth grade.  So you know Kirby is in one of the lower grades.  I lost this battle but I guarantee you this the  war is not over.  More on Kirby later.

The Scholars and Support Personnel

As a reminder the events are real but the names are fictitious.  So in no particular order here are the scholars and support personnel that are in the classroom with me on a daily basis.

BaseG, CorP, Floss, The Collector, Straw, EM, Yo, PhD? Sparty, Ms. IvyL, Gee, Oreo and The Big B.

On occasion guests, former scholars and other support personnel will make an appearance.

What I Do

I am a special education instructional assistant in a grade school in the metropolitan area of Indianapolis.  The classroom is for scholars with emotional disabilities.  The toughest emotion for these scholars to control is anger.  They may also have to deal with autism, oppositional defiance disorders, and attention deficit and hyperactivity disorders plus as a Behavioral Specialist once said to me issues that have not been identified.

When I tell family, friends and others that I meet what I do I usually get one of two responses.  Either thank you for doing what you do or are you thinking clearly.  Opps!  I just recalled a third comment I received when I was doing this as a volunteer.  "You mean you do all this work and you don't get paid?"  Apparently the word volunteer didn't register.

If I was asked to describe what I do in the classroom I can sum it up in two words, obstacle remover.  I will do anything no matter how foolish I look to remove obstacles that prevent these scholars from getting an education.

My Disclaimer

Doing this makes me nervous so I have to say a few things up front.  I am neither a licensed teacher nor a trained teacher.  Now that you know this I can declare with certainty that there will be grammatical errors.  What makes me nervous about making grammatical errors is that both my wife and daughter are language art teachers.  So if by chance you see the font change from black to red and there are notations on the sides of the pages you will know that the teachers have visited my blog.    I'm fine with seeing the dreaded red pen but please ladies no letter grades.

The events that take place are true but the scholars names that will appear throughout this blog are totally made up so if you get the slightest inclination that you recognize one of these scholars then you are letting your imagination get the best of you.  You should also know that guest scholars will make an appearance.  A guest scholar is someone not permanently assigned to my classroom but for timeout purposes spends a little time seated to my immediate right at the back of the room.

I have been at this grade school for three years now dating back to 2011.  As I discuss the scholars, I will do so in a random manner to further confuse those who think they know someone.

How This All Started

I enjoy reading the newspaper and began following columns written by Matthew Tully of the Indianapolis Star.  Mr. Tully had just started a series of articles about his experiences at Manual High School here in Indianapolis.  For those of you that are not familiar with Manual it is a public school on the south side of Indianapolis that has a history of poor student performance and low graduation rates.  As the school year progressed Mr. Tully wrote on both the good and the bad about the school.  I found the stories to be fascinating and looked forward to reading each of his columns about the school.  One of his columns talked about the need for volunteers at the school and I thought to myself maybe I could be a school volunteer.  After a good deal of procrastinating I took the big step and inquired about being a volunteer at a grade school near my home and after passing a background check I was accepted.